Various children
Monday December 12, 2005
Ever see an opening band and think, "I really wish they had the opportunity to headline!" Well, be careful what you wish for. I'd seen Children of Bodom at least four times, but they were always the opener, and not even the direct support most of the time. All of those tours were in support of the band's last album, the very enjoyable Hate Crew Deathroll, and they played those songs TO DEATH. Every set was the same, and I will admit that that was fairly lame, but they played with such an immense energy that I couldn't help but love them every time. This is a band that I hate to love. Lead guitarist/vocalist Alexi Laiho is clearly a coked out asswipe, but the guy can play, and his songs are catchy as hell despite themselves. When they release a new album anymore, I listen to it ready to hate it, and yet that never happens. They're just too fun. So, I was pretty excited (while nonetheless trepidacious) about their headlining show on Friday. Here was that headlining set I'd always wanted - how would the Children conduct themselves?
Pretty badly, as it turns out. Sure, the first 45 minutes were a frenzied good time, like the short sets of old but with more variety in the songs. Then, the drum solo. Why a fucking drum solo? This guy is fine, but he's no drum-king, and even the best drummers are usually unequipped to play a meaningful drum solo. It ended, as all drum solos eventually do, but it wasn't long before the episode was repeated in a keyboard and guitar solo extravaganza. Jesus fucking christ! I guess all the Hot Topic youth in the crowd had never seen Yngwie Malmsteen or Dream Theater, but to me, this sort of instrumental exposition is beyond stale and a complete waste of time. After those five or ten minutes of utterly meaningly noodling, the set lost all its fire. The band came back, of course, and more songs were played, but the energy was gone and my attention was lost. I couldn't get out of the Troc fast enough. The lesson I learned is that some bands, no matter how good, are best enjoyed in moderation. Children of Bodom might be popular enough to sell out the Troc, but they don't have the creative stamina to close the deal the way they should.
The other children I saw were at the movie theater, in The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe. There were kids on screen and kids in the theater, which shocked me somewhat as it was nearly 10:00 by the time the film started. While I thought it was a very good children's movie, most of the kids in my vicinity looked pretty bored and had a hard time concentrating on the film. But then, it was clearly well past their bedtimes. The movie is a very faithful interpretation of the book (at least as far as I can remember - I haven't read it for probably two decades. God, I feel old now.) The Christian allegory is not as obvious as I've built it up to be in my memory, and the plot, on closer inspection, is pretty damned scant, but the effects and pageantry are well done, and the child actors are surprisingly good. The Britishness of the kids probably masks some of their crappiness to American viewers, but I don't mind. If I was a parent with children in the 8-13 range, I would definitely consider this a great movie for them. For adults, it's quite good for reliving the nostalgia of a childhood favorite, but it's too thin and too light to be of much use beyond a momentary diversion.
Posted by Matt at December 12, 2005 02:43 PM
i agree with matt's summary of the Bodom show. i'd like to add the fact that Alexi was a little off his game. like he was too busy trying to "perform" instead of concentrating on his playing. i'd rather have him play well and stand still once in a while (without spitting). also, they played nothing off of "something wild." are you kidding? although "hatebreeder" is my favorite, i demand a nod to the old school! it's like king diamond not playing anything from "fatal portrait"....hmmm, bad example.
Posted by: roman at December 13, 2005 12:45 PM